Thursday, April 12, 2012
Support One Another
One thing couples struggle with is the concept of I instead of Team. It is not all about you or me it's about WE! Well part of being a team is being supportive of each other. I took a bold step in applying for Teach for America. If you know anything about the program, it has A LOT of uncertainty. I submitted my resignation letter in February to leave in May. And I applied for a job for fall in March, though I may not hear if I even have a job until Fall semester starts. I essentially will be teaching for free over the summer and paying for family housing with no income guaranteed. It is really nerve wracking and on top of that few people, especially parents, are not exactly the most supportive of the uncertainty. It takes a lot of trust in God on my part that I am doing the right thing and a lot of trust in me from Scott. This trust alone can only be shown in a marriage, in love. I will never truly be able to understand his devotion but I will always try to do the same for him. I know I don't give myself enough credit for what I do, but it scares me to think about teaching in front students. To think their futures are in my hands, that anything and everything I do will sway them for good or worse. I hope for the first however only time will tell. It scares me but it motivates me to do even more, to be better. To do more for them and to be the best. I think his support goes deep enough to trust in God that everything will work out but to also know that I will be a great teacher.. I think he thinks its what I am meant to be and it is humbling.
House Hunting Begins
House Hunting is definitely stressful - no matter what anyone tells you! I'll try and walk you through the process and we go through a series of mistakes and successes. Fortunately my uncle is a realtor, so he has been able to coach me from another state on the general process. The first thing you need to do when going to look for a house is to get pre qualified for a home loan. Essentially you should get 3 (THREE) pre qualifications to see which company gives you the best deal. It is suggested to do a commercial bank, one of the large banks (Wells Fargo/Bank of America/Etc), and one of your choice. The one we decided on of the three was Fidelity. The lady we are working with just turned out to be the most responsive and educational with us. For the pre qual you will need your W2's, a pay statement, your bills, and bank account statements (a few other documents will be needed based on the company). After they have made their calculations, you will receive a letter stating how much you qualify for and this amount should be what you base your home search on!
Ok, now that the pre qual has been taken care of you can find yourself a realtor. Now, I cannot explain perfectly the difference but I will try to explain my understanding... there is a difference between real estate agent and realtor. A real estate agent is working trying to sell as many houses as possible. A realtor has gone through extra training and has signed a national pledge to be customer focused. So yes, a realtor is also trying to sell houses but they are doing it on the interest of the customer. A realtor is also typically paid by the seller not by the buyer.
We found a local realtor who has so far been phenomenal. She definitely has my interest in sight and does what she can to put me first. The realtor will send us links to houses and we converse about homes until we schedule a date to go out to see them.
After we find a home she will take care of all the paperwork and we just sign the documents. Stephanie is also very good at explaining what things are. Especially with my uncle being so far she is easy to get in touch with and explains what different loans are, what escrow is, what we need to be looking for, and explaining the rest of the process.
We had our first outing with her last week. The houses progressed from worst to best. The worst - well one room had a dog locked in it, and I am pretty sure the dog was never EVER taken out... The second was a nice layout but the kitchen was outdated and the carpet/tile... well it was in the wrong decade for sure! The final house was perfect by far, especially for our price range. We put an offer but as everything, it was too good to be true. Someone had put an offer before us and we lost the house.
Scott has drill for the Army this weekend and won't be in town. My parents and I are going to do a preliminary drive around to see what other houses are available and taking lots of pictures. We will see what we can find before going out with Stephanie again next Wednesday! Maybe we'll be able to put in another offer!
Ok, now that the pre qual has been taken care of you can find yourself a realtor. Now, I cannot explain perfectly the difference but I will try to explain my understanding... there is a difference between real estate agent and realtor. A real estate agent is working trying to sell as many houses as possible. A realtor has gone through extra training and has signed a national pledge to be customer focused. So yes, a realtor is also trying to sell houses but they are doing it on the interest of the customer. A realtor is also typically paid by the seller not by the buyer.
We found a local realtor who has so far been phenomenal. She definitely has my interest in sight and does what she can to put me first. The realtor will send us links to houses and we converse about homes until we schedule a date to go out to see them.
After we find a home she will take care of all the paperwork and we just sign the documents. Stephanie is also very good at explaining what things are. Especially with my uncle being so far she is easy to get in touch with and explains what different loans are, what escrow is, what we need to be looking for, and explaining the rest of the process.
We had our first outing with her last week. The houses progressed from worst to best. The worst - well one room had a dog locked in it, and I am pretty sure the dog was never EVER taken out... The second was a nice layout but the kitchen was outdated and the carpet/tile... well it was in the wrong decade for sure! The final house was perfect by far, especially for our price range. We put an offer but as everything, it was too good to be true. Someone had put an offer before us and we lost the house.
Scott has drill for the Army this weekend and won't be in town. My parents and I are going to do a preliminary drive around to see what other houses are available and taking lots of pictures. We will see what we can find before going out with Stephanie again next Wednesday! Maybe we'll be able to put in another offer!
Date Night
One piece of advice I have for any newly wed couple is actually something we picked up at
premarital class, and something we've noticed most healthy married couples do. Funny thing but Scott and I have made it a priority to have a date night once a week. Yes - you can date your spouse! We do a bit of everything from every price range. We've gone to that expensive restaurant and we've also done the redbox movie night. Make it what you want but make it something that you both enjoy. Take that extra time to talk about life, about how you're doing, and things that have happened since the last time you were able to slow down time together. Funny to say but we don't see each other as much as before the wedding. Life seemed to take off and between work and school we see each other every night but it may be for a shooter amount of time, and it is really tough. That makes the date nights more important and more of a priority for both of us.
premarital class, and something we've noticed most healthy married couples do. Funny thing but Scott and I have made it a priority to have a date night once a week. Yes - you can date your spouse! We do a bit of everything from every price range. We've gone to that expensive restaurant and we've also done the redbox movie night. Make it what you want but make it something that you both enjoy. Take that extra time to talk about life, about how you're doing, and things that have happened since the last time you were able to slow down time together. Funny to say but we don't see each other as much as before the wedding. Life seemed to take off and between work and school we see each other every night but it may be for a shooter amount of time, and it is really tough. That makes the date nights more important and more of a priority for both of us.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Naming Myself
About a week before the wedding, you are supposed to go to your local probate court to apply for a marriage license. Please check your local government regulations for required documents etc. Many hassles later, we acquired it and were able to continue with our wedding. What they don't tell you is that after the wedding, the officiant hands you the signed copy to take back to the probate court to get a marriage certificate. Well, this information wasn't posted and I wasted valuable time and gas in getting necessary things done.
Last Saturday (3 weeks after the wedding), I went to the nearby DMV to get my name changed. I had the signed copy of the marriage license not the certificate (oh and they use certificate and license interchangeably as if they are the same thing, when they are not!!), my birth certificate, and drivers license. Turns out they don't need the birth certificate, however after an hour and a half waiting, we were denied because I did not have the right paperwork. The gentlemen at the counter did tell me I could come straight to the window next time. Needless to say, we left and I started crying I was so upset.
Monday during lunch I drove to the probate court. I made a mistake the first time and paid to park (pay attention to the signs!!). I paid in a free parking for 2 hours. I was in and out within 10 minutes! Scott also did not need to go with me which was great with our crazy schedules. I had enough time to drive to the DMV too, but as you know something would go wrong - it was closed!!!
Frustrated, I knew Georgia had something against me changing my name. Well, I decided to try one more time. Tuesday during lunch I drove back to the DMV with a heavy determination. Upon arrival, I noticed the parking lot was packed and a line stood outside trying to just enter. I feared the worst looking at my clock. I waited in the line for about 20 minutes to just sign in. I sat down inside looking at the numbers being called. I held B402 in my hand.. they had just called B364. I knew it would never work, I didn't have the time. I looked around to see if the same guy from Saturday was there, and to my delight he was! My heart jumped up and pulled me to the counter. I waited as he helped out a gentleman. He had a smile on his face so I knew he was in a good mood too. Once the man left, I stepped up and told him he had asked me to come to the counter on Saturday. He grabbed my ticket and looked on the computer. He said I'm glad you came up, you saved over an hour wait! I was so excited I couldn't help but smile! Within 7 minutes we were done and I was walking back to my car texting pictures to both sets of parents and my husband. It was a huge sign of relief knowing that I can now take steps towards doing things we want like purchasing a home!
Last Saturday (3 weeks after the wedding), I went to the nearby DMV to get my name changed. I had the signed copy of the marriage license not the certificate (oh and they use certificate and license interchangeably as if they are the same thing, when they are not!!), my birth certificate, and drivers license. Turns out they don't need the birth certificate, however after an hour and a half waiting, we were denied because I did not have the right paperwork. The gentlemen at the counter did tell me I could come straight to the window next time. Needless to say, we left and I started crying I was so upset.
Monday during lunch I drove to the probate court. I made a mistake the first time and paid to park (pay attention to the signs!!). I paid in a free parking for 2 hours. I was in and out within 10 minutes! Scott also did not need to go with me which was great with our crazy schedules. I had enough time to drive to the DMV too, but as you know something would go wrong - it was closed!!!
Frustrated, I knew Georgia had something against me changing my name. Well, I decided to try one more time. Tuesday during lunch I drove back to the DMV with a heavy determination. Upon arrival, I noticed the parking lot was packed and a line stood outside trying to just enter. I feared the worst looking at my clock. I waited in the line for about 20 minutes to just sign in. I sat down inside looking at the numbers being called. I held B402 in my hand.. they had just called B364. I knew it would never work, I didn't have the time. I looked around to see if the same guy from Saturday was there, and to my delight he was! My heart jumped up and pulled me to the counter. I waited as he helped out a gentleman. He had a smile on his face so I knew he was in a good mood too. Once the man left, I stepped up and told him he had asked me to come to the counter on Saturday. He grabbed my ticket and looked on the computer. He said I'm glad you came up, you saved over an hour wait! I was so excited I couldn't help but smile! Within 7 minutes we were done and I was walking back to my car texting pictures to both sets of parents and my husband. It was a huge sign of relief knowing that I can now take steps towards doing things we want like purchasing a home!
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Dance the Night Away
The night of the wedding was a blur. We couldn't talk about anything in the car except how perfect everything was. It was such a surreal feeling - to be married!! Just calling him husband and vice versa..
When we got to the hotel, we realized my bag was at home. It would be at least half an hour before my brother would arrive with it. I was exhausted. The hotel room had a living room area separate from the bedroom and we both got into the room and sat down then sat. We must have just sat for 5 minutes in silence just letting the day catch up to us.
We left everything but one small basket. It was probably the most beautiful basketball, picnic style with plates, utensils, food packaged for us from the caterer, and a bottle of sparkling cider to top it off. The only problem was the dress. I refused to eat until a change of clothes arrived (the hotel did not have a table to eat at). Scott knew I was getting a little frustrated. It was 10:30pm and we were hungry and couldn't do much. He took out his phone turned on music and reached his hands out towards me. I grabbed his hands and we danced. We danced two or three songs barefoot, twirling, and just enjoying each other. Time flew by but it was the perfect way to end a night of the most amazing day I will probably ever have!
When we got to the hotel, we realized my bag was at home. It would be at least half an hour before my brother would arrive with it. I was exhausted. The hotel room had a living room area separate from the bedroom and we both got into the room and sat down then sat. We must have just sat for 5 minutes in silence just letting the day catch up to us.
We left everything but one small basket. It was probably the most beautiful basketball, picnic style with plates, utensils, food packaged for us from the caterer, and a bottle of sparkling cider to top it off. The only problem was the dress. I refused to eat until a change of clothes arrived (the hotel did not have a table to eat at). Scott knew I was getting a little frustrated. It was 10:30pm and we were hungry and couldn't do much. He took out his phone turned on music and reached his hands out towards me. I grabbed his hands and we danced. We danced two or three songs barefoot, twirling, and just enjoying each other. Time flew by but it was the perfect way to end a night of the most amazing day I will probably ever have!
A New Beginning
If you want to check out our story before hand, please click on this link here. There is valuable insight as to the planning and execution of a wedding!
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